Humanist Ceremonies - Gillian Stewart

Gillian Stewart talks about Humanist Ceremonies - how humanist funerals differ from religious funerals.

Thought For The Day - Transcript - Gillian Stewart - 17th February 2007
I’m not telling you anything new when I say that religion has been around for a long, long time and, historically, one of its roles has been to mark the various rites of passage that humans experience in their lifetimes.

So why now, at this time in our history, do we need a secular alternative? The answer is quite simple really, in this day and age people expect and indeed demand choice. It’s no longer acceptable just to say ‘That’s the way it’s always been done’, because as humans we are constantly striving to find better, more suitable alternatives to pretty much everything in life, and that includes living!

And humanism offers a real way of being in the 21st Century, because it’s basic philosophy is about treating each other and the world we live in with respect – issues that have certainly always been relevant, but I would suggest never more so than at this point in our history. Amazingly there are still a great many people out there who haven’t even heard of humanism, let alone know what it means, so as a celebrant who conducts a variety of non-religious ceremonies I consider myself to be on the front line of offering people a positive experience of humanism.

So what’s so different about a humanist ceremony you might ask? Well many people comment that our ceremonies are extremely enjoyable and this applies to our funerals in particular, which you might find a strange thing to say! I think what is meant by that is that what we offer is a very real and very personal tribute of the person who has died and those close to the deceased find great comfort in that. When conducting a funeral ceremony I always meet with members of the family and hopefully friends of the deceased too. The more people I can speak to, the more honest a picture I can build up of the person who is being remembered, warts and all! Understandably there are often tears, but there can often be laughter too, because I’m focusing on the life of that person, not just their death. Hilary Stanton Zunin once said “The risk of love is loss, and the price of loss is grief”, and of course it is deeply sad when someone that we love has died, but the fact that they lived and enriched the lives of those around them deserves to be celebrated too.

Each and every one of us has a unique part to play in this world, and our ceremonies focus on that uniqueness. And whether I’m welcoming a new life into the world, celebrating the joining of two lives in marriage, or remembering with joy and compassion the life of a loved one, I do so with the utmost respect because we are all the same and basically that’s what humanism means to me…being human. I wonder what it means to you?

Details: Gillian Stewart

My background lies in Nursery Nursing and over the years I have worked at the Queen Mother's Special Care Baby Unit at Yorkhill Hospital in Glasgow, at a Nursery School and Family Centre in Fife, and along with 2 other women run my own successful private Nursery business.
In 1987 our son Roy was born. Unfortunately he had a serious heart and lung condition, which meant that his life was limited. Sadly Roy died when he was just 4 years old and my husband and I were devastated. This loss, along with other painful losses of both my parents, gradually led me towards humanism.
When we suffer such losses it makes us question what life is all about, and I decided that I wanted to use my experiences positively and in a way that would help others. So I started working with the families of children with life-limiting illnesses at Rachel House Children's Hospice in Kinross. It was a truly wonderful experience and I learned so much.
However there finally came a point in my life where I had to think about moving on and when I discovered humanism it felt like the last piece in the jigsaw puzzle had fallen into place, and since becoming a humanist celebrant I have been both challenged and fulfilled in the role of conducting non-religious ceremonies to mark the important events that occur throughout our lives. Whether it's a baby naming, a wedding or a funeral, my aim is to create a personal and memorable experience for everyone involved. www.humanism-scotland.org.uk
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